Find me here:

[link]

I'll do my best to add my friends again, but if I miss anyone, that's where you'll find me.

I wish I could change it, but unfortunately I'm probably going to be stuck with an account name I chose when I was 13-year-old retard indefinitely.

Maybe I have to create a time machine, go back and tell myself to name differently.

Epiphany #2: The world is FULL of idiots.

I'm not even going to drag this one out, I could be here for days crapping on like this, that would be an invalid waste of time for me and you both (since you're reading this).

Most of this idiocy arises from this insatiable desire for attention that whiny little teenagers seem to crave these days. There are so many ways people can pull off being idiots that I don't really want to get started, so I'm just going to jump straight to the number one thing that pisses me off.

Mob mentality/conformity. Nothing else pisses me off more than that, it's the #1 source of ALL stupidity.

I can't understand for the life of me why people can't just live life and be themselves without posing for the rest of the world and crying out for attention. Like people who label themselves, i.e. People with the word 'Goth' or 'Emo' in their username, or who proudly refer to themselves as such. Then you go to their page and they're all like "Yeah, death is awesome. Boy, I sure love blood." followed with the shittiest 'dark' poetry they can muster, because apparently it makes them look all awesome, mysterious and unique, just like the hundreds of other 'Goths' and 'Emos' out there. Whatever happened to liking sports and games, or animals, or the outdoors and stuff? Why are kids these days into self-mutilation and crappy music and virtually nothing else? I can't stand people who proudly wear labels. None of these people are genuinely Gothic or genuinely Emo, its just them vainly trying to model themselves as close to the stereotype as possible because they think they'll be all hardcore like Billie Joe Armstrong from Green Day.

Newsflash for you kids: Go outside. There's a whole world out there. Stop living in your tiny pathetic bubbles and buying into shitty trends because large multinational companies are brainwashing you into buying their shitty products that they sell for $723,243, when in fact they were made by starving kids in Malaysia who get paid 50c an hour to make your shitty mass produced 'Unique' tee-shirts. I know half the clothes I own are probably made by slaves, but I at least spare the retailers their million dollar markup and buy from wholesalers (seriously). Sure, that isn't saving the kids, but I'm not giving the big guys up there any satisfaction from MY damn pockets.

The point of this slightly crappy post? Learn to be yourself. In the genuine fucking sense. Explore yourself and find out who you really are and what you really like instead of sheepishly following all the other lemmings off the cliff. There's more to the world than making idiotic statements for attention and your shitty, unoriginal music (granted that some of it is actually pretty good) that you listen to while you cut your wrists because your life in American suburbia sucks and your daddy didn't buy you that new car.

Take a seat. Make yourself comfortable. I just have some thoughts (or if you want to be frank, "bitches") I need to share with the general public. Like you care. But at the same time, I feel a lot of you will agree with what I have to say on two matters that just occurred to me whilst browsing DeviantART.

Epiphany #1: The furry fandom is extremely laughable.

Now this is an odd claim for me to make. I haven't exactly advertised it, but I do have a fursona that I frequently use and so I can claim to be a 'furry' perhaps. Right. Even I recognize this as being a little odd, but there's nothing wrong with it. Its just like someone drawing a cartoon version of themself. We never draw ourselves 100% accurately (Unless we're talking realism here), so fantasy comes into play. No big deal.

I have no issues against furries, but some of the furry culture is laughable. About 75% of it is made up of self-conscious nymphomaniacs.

I'm sure you're all familiar with Jessica Elwood: [link] . Her deviations commonly occur in the 'opular' and 'rints' section on Deviantart's front page. First off, she's a brilliant artist. She has excellent technique and I wholeheartedly support the body image she's promoting, with images of buxom and healthily-bodied women, as opposed to tiny twigs with monolithic, gravity-defying breasts (I also enjoy the fact that her breasts tend to obey gravity too.)

At the same time, and I hate to use her as an example since I admire her ability... Have you noticed something in her gallery? A trend, perhaps? I'll tell you. She has 180 Deviations according to her front page. From a rough count, about 30 of these are pictures of herself (her own fursona). This seems quite a small number compared to the 180 total (even if I didn't look through them all). But bear in mind that more than half of these feature her either naked or barely clothed. I know I'm going to get flamed to hell for this, but come on. A 22 year old woman posting multiple suggestive pictures of her cat/dog/fox alter ego on the internet for the world to see. It's like being a weak porn star. People who do that are often looking for attention (since people identify her with her fursona even though in reality, its a freaking drawing. She's a woman sitting at a computer, not a wolf/cat/dog/fox/penguin thing). If she wants the world to think she's a hot sex beast, why restrict it to fantastical images? Why not post pictures of yourself spreading on the internet? I know that's an ambitious comment, granted that her art is neither extremely pornographic nor drawn for the purpose to seduce/stroke her ego. She's just doing art, the end. I'm just raising a point here. There are people much, much worse out there, and I'm about to show you the breaking point of this.

Allow me to introduce to you: [link]

ALL but ONE of the pictures in her gallery are pictures of her fursona/alter ego either making out with some random dude or naked somewhere. And she doesn't have the talent to back it up with either. She came out and said it: she traces hentai to make these drawings. Frequently. And she actually took the next step and posted photographs of herself. What can I say though? At least the breast size is accurate.

And on a final note, when I see these erotic furry drawings. And I NEVER see this on nude photography or erotic realism... Furry erotica... I always have a quick scroll through the comments. Always, there is at least one person that is really unsubtle, like "OH GOD. *ERECTION*" (actual quote from one of Chalo's works) or "THAT MAKES ME SO HORNY!!!!" and I have a quick look at their profile. Some of these kids are boys as young as 13. Jesus christ. I know it's normal for them to be looking up pr0n and etc etc, but when you're that young, animals fucking usually isn't a turn on. It takes many years of jading to prefer a fox and a bird yiffing to actual human porn.

All in all, as much as I enjoy the fandom, it has many, many laughable points. I'm almost reluctant to call myself a furry and identify myself with this population.

Okay. Usually when I say I have complaints, they're witty, ego-serving and are generally NOT pathetic. This is different. This will be one of the most pathetic, snivelly, whiny posts you'll ever read. It'll make you go B'AAAAAAW, DINNY IS WEAK. I'll get over it in time, but. Here it is.

My two best subjects, blow.

I've spent twelve years at school now, and the need to lift a finger to achieve 100% grades never came about. Everything has been purely effortless. Until now.

I guess I should have been expecting such a thing, and I have to say I sort of was. I just thought I'd take it better than I have been. Apparently I'm not as comfortable with criticism on my work as I thought I would be.

The memory-oriented subjects, the topics I have been somewhat lackluster in throughout my entire life, are actually proving to be the easiest and most productive. So, Biology, SL Math, Business and Management, hell, even Indonesian language, which I'm not particularly fond of.

History and English (which I have never received a grade below 100% in. Dead serious.)... Are my two worst at the moment.

And considering my running record of high grades, including being the highest-scoring person in History/Humanities last year, they all expect godly work from me. I'm shit scared that I'll let them down, especially since they're expecting so much from me and I'm not sure if I can work to that standard, especially given my inherent laziness. To make matters worse, my History teacher is forever dulling my spirits by bringing up how 1337 his class last year was.

I was not present for it, but apparently today he showed the work of last year's students to our class. So, get this. They were at the same stage as us. About seven weeks into the year. They did a presentation on an aspect of WWI. We were given the same task, at the same time. Their standard of work was LEAGUES ahead of ours in the same amount of time. I heard that the presentations of last year's History students were so good my classmates almost cried. And even then, history teacher says that it ONLY warrants for a 5-6 mark out of a possible 7. If that's true, what I've done so far can only amount to, I don't know, maybe a 2.

English is highly intimidating. It's giving me the most work, and frankly, as much as I enjoy Shakespeare, Macbeth isn't in my interests. I was looking forward to studying Hamlet, but noooo, it had to be Macbeth. Ehhhhh.

I'm not quitting the IB, but I'm seriously considering changing subjects around, especially quitting History. Maybe it is weak of me, but I cannot produce work of that standard in a thousand years. And to bust your butt off on something that close to perfection, but they STILL hesitate to give you full grades? Come on. Bullcrap. It's not worth it.